I laughed when I saw it: surely this was some kind of hilarious New Yorker meta-joke, an article by Jonathan Franzen, a writer with whom I struggle entirely on the basis of his privilege, about struggling to sympathize with Edith Wharton on the basis of her privilege? What delicious irony! For who could be less qualified to discuss the writing of women than a straight white male writer, purportedly worth $70 million at this point, who once expressed his distress that women, encouraged by Oprah, might read and ruin his manly, manly books? Could there be any better pot-kettle-black joke than this?
Unfortunately, it was not a joke, and Franzen was not only interested in criticizing Wharton’s moneyed background, but also committed the following sentences to print:
Wharton did have one potentially redeeming disadvantage: she wasn’t pretty. The fine quip of one of Wharton’s contemporary reviewers—that she wrote like a masculine Henry James—could also be applied to her social pursuits: she wanted to be with the men and to talk about the things men talked about.
I do not think I need to point out the ways in which this is beyond horrific, as others have already done so, and I know I don’t need to mention how INFURIATING it is to see the NEW YORKER writing about A WOMAN WRITER’S LOOKS, while CRITICIZING her for wanting to BE ONE OF THE BOYS, and going on to BLAME HER for the fact that her husband SPIRALED INTO INSANITY all thanks to her SEXUAL FRIGIDITY and SUCCESS. We don’t need to talk about that anymore, because I already did, to myself, for two hours after I first read the piece, as I stormed around my apartment in a blind rage slamming doors and flinging dishes about, muttering under my breath and periodically sprinting back to my computer to send Le R another unhinged OH MY GOD I AM SO MAD CAN WE HAVE WHISKEY e-mail. No. We don’t need to talk about that anymore, do we?
So once you’ve stopped banging your head against the desk, let’s note that wealth and privilege interfering with a writer’s sympathies is not a critique I believe women are (or ought to be) immune to; such a critique is at the root of my vague discomfort with Jennifer Egan and Elizabeth Gilbert. But Franzen’s critique of Wharton’s privilege could benefit from the context of another little book written by another lady, nine years after The Age of Innocence. I am speaking, of course, of Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own, and in the half dozen or so times I have read it, I am reasonably sure that it sets out to prove that in order to write, one must have a.) privacy and b.) wealth, two things that all but the most privileged of women were (are?) consistently denied. J-Franz does our girl Edith a great disservice by contextualizing her work within the frame of her life, but not within the frame of what that life meant, what it meant to be a rich and ugly woman with a thorny personality in her time period. We can sneer at Wharton’s leisurely existence and overbearing ambition, but it’s essentially what enabled her to write at all. For Franzen to blatantly disregard this, and then to drag her looks into the argument too, is depressing, to say the least.
Beyond that odious excerpt currently available online, Franzen eventually abandons his obsession with Wharton’s looks, finances, and sex life and talks about some of her books. He focuses on Wharton’s proclivity for complicated, nasty heroines that we still care for, suggesting that we find them sympathetic because we are able to align our desires (to be prettier, to have more money?) with theirs. He seems genuinely amazed that the manipulative, scheming, shallow women who populate Wharton’s novels elicit sympathy at all, suggesting that his idea of ladies is perhaps slightly less nuanced than hers, but whatever. His list of similar antiheroes that he’s cared about, from Atticus Finch to Raskolnikov, includes but one woman—Becky Sharp in Vanity Fair, who was, incidentally, written by a man. Unsurprisingly, as I have talked about this antihero lady thing before, I was less than pleased.
Franzen’s conclusion—“As if aware of what an unlikeable figure she herself cut, she placed unlikable women in the foreground of these novels and then deployed the storyteller’s most potent weapon, the contagiousness of fictional desire, to create sympathy for them”—is not even a statement I can completely disagree with. But in the context of his previous comments about her ugliness, her wealth, her persnickety and selfish nature, her frigidity (“heinous prude bitch who doesn’t even need me financially”) I found no consolation. I didn’t feel any less angry than I did two paragraphs into the article, despite his ever-so-gracious concessions to her skill. I felt angrier.
To be honest, I felt hysterical: that Victorian word for the tantrums of unstable estrogen-addled women, but that I know actually describes a rage forcibly contained, the hot burn of the involuntary tears, the snap in your composure when you are told for the millionth time that what you feel or think or say or do does not matter. I thought that complex, nuanced, funny, difficult, despicably lovable characters were the emblem of a good writer, not evidence of the insecure woman thieving our sympathies through sneaky writer-succubus tricks. And yet one hundred and fifty years after Edith Wharton wrote a number of canonical, excellent books, some rich white straight dude gets paid—what does the New Yorker pay for that kind of piece, like ten grand?—gets paid like ten grand to come to the riveting, breathtaking conclusion that she might be human, and maybe even A Writer, like him?
As a woman with writerly delusions, I took it personally. It validated so many secret worries, the worries above and beyond “is my writing any good.” Is anyone gonna care? Should I just keep trying to figure out what I want to do, even if nobody will ever pay me? Am I being a bitch for writing about this? Does this matter?Am I pretty enough for people to like me, or too pretty to be taken seriously? If I ever create anything noteworthy, will people spend the next century and a half critiquing my looks and my sex life, pelting me with insults for trying too hard to be one of the boys? If one of the most famous female novelists of our time is still critiqued for her looks and sex life, what the hell can I expect? And Wharton was straight! I’m not! It’s entirely hopeless! Why even bother?
Which, if anything, is the only thing to take away from this debacle. That 150 years after the fact, Edith Wharton’s work is still fighting the same fight I am, every day, and that I will for the rest of my life, and that every last woman I love and admire will as well, because to do otherwise feels like death. To be real and to be whole, to create and learn and celebrate and screw up and to be taken seriously with the boys, as a real human, to slam my head against every wall until it gives and to fight tooth and nail with every ounce of my skinny little girl body, whether it takes another century or not, for what I know I deserve and know I can do. To keep on, despite and in deliberate spite of what is said. To not give up.
Meg Clark is my friend and a writer and really fucking smart.
I heart: female writers, listening to music, saying funny phrases, playing out of date video games, driving barefoot, independent horror movies, and scratching my dog's tummy.
(All icons used belong to DayofJudah@LJ!)
How Dan Savage Begins Every Single Offensive Comment He Has Ever Said Ever
| Dan Savage: | I know that people will think I'm [transphobic/biphobic/acephobic/ableist/sexist/racist] for saying this, but [insert extremely offensive comment here]. |
| The Internet: | Why the fuck would you say something like that if you knew it was going to offend someone? |
| Dan Savage: | [Insert suitable apology/rant here] |
| Me: | Go fuck yourself. |
won’t you celebrate with me
what i have shaped into
a kind of life? i had no model.
born in babylon
both nonwhite and woman
what did i see to be except myself?
i made it up
here on this bridge between
starshine and clay,
my one hand holding tight
my other hand; come celebrate
with me that everyday
something has tried to kill me
and has failed.
"
Atlas Shrugged is basically donkey balls.
1. Dan Savage hates trans people and uses transphobic slurs.
“Children have a right to some stability and constancy from the adults in their lives. Perhaps I’m a transphobic bigot, but I honestly think waiting a measly 36 months to cut your dick is a sacrifice any father should be willing to make for his 15-year-old son. Call me old-fashioned.
Unfortunately, your ex wasn’t willing to make that sacrifice (selfish tranny!), or it never occurred to him to make that sacrifice (stupid tranny!)…. If your son can’t deal with having his dad/mom/whatever around right now, support him and tell his dad/mom/whatever to leave the two of you alone for the time being.”
2. Dan Savage believes that bisexuals do not and should not exist.
“I’m not saying bi guys are bad people, or they don’t make great one-night stands. Bushes, bathhouses, and sleazy gay bars are crawling with bi guys. But if a guy wants more, he’ll have an easier time getting it from another gay man.”
3. Dan Savage has admonished women for not putting up with their partner’s sexual desires and has criticized female rape survivors’ stories.
“There the guy was, boned for you, and he was brave enough to put his desires out there, to make himself vulnerable (which is what the ladies are always saying they want, right?), and you lobbed the ol’ “What?!?” bomb at him and made him feel like a freak. Is it any wonder that he quickly moved on to “other things” and, one would hope, better sex partners?”
“I’m extremely sorry that you were raped, DRARS, although your baseless accusations of rape make me doubt you when you claim to be a survivor of rape. The feminist bloggers are going to accuse me of thought crimes: If a woman says she was raped then, by God, she was raped. (Tell it to the lacrosse team.) But if my reaction to your letter is a thought crime, I can only plead entrapment: I wouldn’t have had these illegal thoughts if you hadn’t sent me such a stupid letter in the first place… Finally, DRARS, I hereby withdraw my consent for you to read Savage Love. If you continue to read my column against my will, well, we all know what word to apply to your actions.”
4. Dan Savage thinks that racist gay white men are less of a threat to African-Americans than homophobic African-Americans are to gay people.
EDIT: The quote below is indeed Dan’s response to Prop 8 and black homophobia, I have added some more of the senseless shit that has spewed out of his mouth so that no one will be confused as to how much of an asshole he is:
“I do know this, though: I’m done pretending that the handful of racist gay white men out there—and they’re out there, and I think they’re scum—are a bigger problem for African Americans, gay and straight, than the huge numbers of homophobic African Americans are for gay Americans, whatever their color…I’ll eat my shorts if gay and lesbian voters went for McCain at anything approaching the rate that black voters went for Prop 8.”
EDIT: Here are some more lovely gems from our resident asshole Dan Savage on his rampant hatred for everything not white, male, and gay:
5. Dan Savage thinks asexuals are secretly “fags”.
“I appreciate the feedback, Stephanie, and I’m sorry I offended you. But… um… I couldn’t help but think, as I read your letter, that your boyfriend is either a fool or a fag. But if it works for you guys—if a romantic relationship devoid of sexual attraction and activity works for you guys—then it works for you guys. Who am I to argue with success?”
6. Dan Savage is fatphobic.
“First off, LARDASS, you neglected to include a sign-off, forcing me to create one for you. I tried to create one that captured the spirit and tone of your letter, and I think I did pretty well… I am thoroughly annoyed at having my tame statements of fact—being heavy is a health risk; rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly—characterized as ‘hate speech.’”
EDIT: I’ve got a lot of requests for citations, so here they are. They get even worse, believe me — the sexual kink that Savage admonishes the woman for was because he believed it was totally ok for her boyfriend wanting to put his nutsack into her vagina. Because that is a totally unsurprising sexual desire to request for.
TRIGGER WARNING: These articles contain transphobic comments/slurs, victim-blaming, racism, hatred of all kinds and colors
1. Transphobia
2. Biphobia (Here’s another where he basically blames Bisexuals for their own oppression….yeah.)
3. Sexism (kink) / Sexism (victim-blaming)
4. Racism & Prop 8 (Here’s another bullshit article he did on the same topic)
5. Acephobia
6. Fat-shaming (Here’s a rant where he says that Iowa should ban fat marriage instead of banning gay marriage because that totally makes more sense)
(June 7, 1938)
Miss Mary T. Ford
Searcy,
ArkansasDear Miss Ford,
Your letter of recent date has been received in the Inking and Painting Department for reply.
Women do not do any of the creative work in connection with preparing the cartoons for the screen, as that work is performed entirely by young men. For this reason girls are not considered for the training school.
The only work open to women consists of tracing the characters on clear celluloid sheets with India ink and filling in the tracings on the reverse side with paint according to the directions.
In order to apply for a position as “Inker” or “Painter” it is necessary that one appear at the Studio, bringing samples of pen and ink and water color work. It would not be advisable to come to Hollywood with the above specifically in view, as there are really very few openings in comparison with the number of girls who apply.
Yours very truly,
WALT DISNEY PRODUCTIONS, LTD.
This shit pisses me off so much you have no idea.
(Source: fucknodisneycorporation)
I really hate Tumblr feminism. I really do. All I’ve learned so far is that I’m a horrible person for being white and all white men are potential rapists and I’m supposed to sit and listen to Bratmobile and take instagram pictures of my unshaved armpits.
Okay well because you made the effort to write a decent response I feel like I should definitely elaborate more as this is definitely not my perception of all feminists.
For my thesis, I wrote about “Gender In Cinema” which meant I had to thoroughly research feminist film theory which I did and to be honest as much as I agreed with a lot of the points, I can to the conclusion that it was somewhat idealistic and that cinema is something which has become more a commodity and market than an art form so it basically gives the people what they want to see.
Both men and women buy into Scarlett Johansson’s catsuit, if you know what I mean. That was one example of my conclusion of that. Maybe it’s not the indoctrination of patriarchy, maybe women admire her beauty and want to be like her. It’s been like that since the dawn of cinema, just like men want to be the epitome of masculinity like Humphrey Bogart. It’s primal for me rather than “indocrination” and that’s my argument.
As far as “shaming” goes, I think it’s awesome when a girl wants to grow it all out because she feels more comfortable that way. I don’t care what other women do and in fact I think women should embrace the fact that body hair can be seen as a sort of badge of maturity and womanhood, for example porn stars have started to embrace this for example Sasha Grey is not always “bald” and old pictures of Bettie Page where her body hair is perceived as erotic and womanly rather than “untidy” or lazy. If you think what I said was “shaming” think of it another way, maybe if I see a girl going out of her way to show everyone how “non-comformist” she is with her body hair, I feel like I’m being lectured because I choose to shave and I’m “adhering to the standards of beauty solidified by patriarchy”.
I mean, maybe it just feels better to me and I feel like it’s hygienic. In a way, going out of your way to show off something like makes me feel like I’m a “victim” of “patriarchy” and in a sense being shamed myself. Mine is a choice, just like hers and it’s not “men” or Vogue magazine that makes me do it.
As far as whiteness goes, I am a Northern European Irish girl. My parents came from working class backgrounds and worked very hard all their lives to eventually provide me with clothes on my back, food in my mouth and a roof over my head, along with an education they could never have. From what I have learned by parents/grandparents lives were anything but “privileged”.
The privilege is only in the colour of their skin (guilty of being white) which is something no one should have guilt about and I completely also acknowledge that racism still exists but I cannot accept that through my existence as a white Irish person my existence stands for racism and “Imperialism”.
If you look at the history of my people, this is certainly not the case and I am excluding Irish-Americans from this. I have no guilt for being “privileged” since my ancestors didn’t have it and I am can appreciate I am lucky to have it since they didn’t. I can’t fight for the world and I feel like trying to put yourself up there as the “good whitey” is patronising and insincere since I know nothing about living in a third world country and it’s why the Kony 2012 bullshit was extremely offensive to me. One example. It comes across as self gratifying.
As far as trauma goes and “triggering”, I understand that Post-Traumatic Stress is an awful thing for anyone to experience and completely exists and I am not unsympathetic to anyone who suffers from it. For me personally, I have experienced trauma, I have experienced depression and anxiety but I feel like I can’t shut myself away from bad things I see even if they remind me of my past. I am lucky enough never to have experienced a family member to be murdered in from of me, which has happened during atrocities all across history, The Holocaust, The Rwandan Genocide. To me, these are things I feel I am lucky in my situation/country/generation never to have experienced so instead of dwelling on my own problems and treating them as best I can, I try and learn as much as I can about devastating trauma that generations will never get over and try and pluck up as much courage to live as I can. The world is an uncaring, cruel, unjust place and I try my best to be as understanding, tolerant and listen more than I talk as much as possible. That’s where I stand. Feminism can’t save the world. All movements/religions/philosophies are flawed. I just want to be a good person because I am only one of billions. Human beings are tiny and weak and we’re fundamentally similar and that’s what I believe.
That’s where I stand at the moment. I believe in always learning and never falling into one slot and become indeed “indoctrinated” and closed minded.
I sort of feel like your mind is made up and there’s really nothing I can say to change it, since I explained my perspective already and we’ve met no middle ground. I’ll leave this here so that other folks can read your response, so you can be heard on the issue, and so other can take up the argument if they see fit. As I said, I’ve stated my position, and it’s clear you’ve come to conclusions that aren’t going to be moved by my words.
I’m just going to leave this image (this highly circulated image by the way) here because it pretty much sums up everything I would have said anyway about the initial comment about tumblr feminism:
I have no idea what part of tumblr you stumbled upon, because I sincerely feel like if not for tumblr I wouldn’t feel so strongly for feminist issues at all. In fact, I believe that the wonderful feminists I have followed/stumbled upon on this site have made me a better feminist, because I have been subjected to a variety of different people’s opinions and stories.
Because when you’re talking about the concept of racism and various other forms of oppression there’s literally no way that someone is going to come out of the conversation unhurt. Prejudice is messy, and hateful, and seemingly infinite, and it’s completely natural for people to get defensive about it when they feel personally attacked — because when is it not personal? All you can pretty much do is sit back and listen and try to learn from those who suffer from it so that you can try to understand where they’re coming from.
And only then can you actually get up and do something about it.
(Source: la-madrina)
For anyone who only sees gender and sex in black and white, here’s proof by the lovely humon that nature is just as fluid with representations of gender and sex as we are.
Despite the title, this video is proof that girls don’t suck at video games; Guys just have an unfair advantage.
won’t you celebrate with me
what i have shaped into
a kind of life? i had no model.
born in babylon
both nonwhite and woman
what did i see to be except myself?
i made it up
here on this bridge between
starshine and clay,
my one hand holding tight
my other hand; come celebrate
with me that everyday
something has tried to kill me
and has failed.
"
How about you shut the fuck up and don’t tell women what to do?
RESPECT WOMEN, you condescending asswipe.
Speaking as a bloke, I don’t give a damn about the sexual history of anybody I date. NOR SHOULD ANYBODY. Guess I’m just more mature than you though, you probably don’t even have hair on your balls yet.
Slut shamers should not be allowed to have sex ever.
that last line :’)
YES. OMG I am so tired of DC/Marvel not only dressing women up in these overly sexualized outfits (also unsafe as fuck how the hell is that costume supposed to protect Psylocke???!!) but also drawing them in these crazy and totally unrealistic poses which makes it so unbearably obvious that all the writers/artists don’t give a fuck about what female superheroes do — they just need to look hot so that guys can drool over them. I’m glad gingerhaze pointed this out! I loled so hard at the gifs!!!
(Source: benditlikebeifong)
